tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35332319294783584312024-03-13T05:51:56.417-06:00Michelle Pilarlittle ones. love. adventures. lifeMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.comBlogger348125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-81483761083797499502017-02-21T21:43:00.002-07:002017-02-21T21:44:55.929-07:00Babies- going going gone<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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[for the record. I love my kids and enjoy my life with them. I'm not looking for advice here hahah. Just getting out my thoughts and feelings.]</div>
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Everyone around me, around my age, are either having their first baby or they are in the middle of the baby toddler phase. Its the phase of the baby chub, blabber, and just baby magic! It's an amazing time. And I find myself looking at all these pictures and posts longing for that time. And feeling like I am a horrible mother. HA! They are these happy moms who are just in love with their phase their in. Which is amazing. It really is. I was there once guys. But I was a teen mom, and even though I KNOW that and the fact I got started early- I'm still so shocked by the difference of our "mom lives" right now.<br />
Cause here's where I am now.<br />
My oldest child turns 10 this summer. My youngest babe turns 2 this spring. Scatter some sassy emotional 8 year old and some of that evolving 4 year old. I'm done for. I am not in that lovey dovey heart eyes stage. No. They all have their unique challenges (and joys of course) and it has me wasted on the couch by 4:00.<br />
The fighting is hard core. There's no blood... yet. But there might as well be with all the screaching Lafe does and cruel talking and yelling Beck throws down.<br />
Sometimes I think .. what the hell am I doing?! How did this happen?! Why are they so big? Why do they hate me?!? and WILL THEY EVER STOP FIGHTING?? and finally.. Does it get better?<br />
It just seems at times to be so dang hard! While we're at it.. I'm just going to go ahead and get this off my chest. Ever since I had my first boy, I thought ... " Noooooo the awkward boy years! " You know the ones. Boys!! ages 9-14... BOYs! I have a pretty great older boy. But that boy phase is a real thing. And we are in it. And I bite my tongue a lot.<br />
Maybe it's the whole span of ages I have with my kids. The screaching 2 year old with the sassy 8 year old. But then again, I've surprisingly loved the different aspect the age gaps have brought.<br />
Maybe this is just life. Life goes on and gets busy and crazy and personalities develop and kids grow! Who knew!<br />
Maybe we all get to this point in motherhood. I think so.<br />
Maybe I need to remember that I had my time with that precious phase. No other obligations. Just toddlers and babies. I had that. And time is taking us on a journey now to our new phases. And it kinda feels like a new phase every other month.<br />
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Last night my oldest two were playing M.A.S.H. Hilarious. I just stayed in the next room and listened in on their giggles and secrets of who they like. When I finally came in they wanted to do the M.A.S.H to me. Beck was adamant about Tucker being the only option for husband. Thank you Beck. Aside from that, they did it all traditional style. And I got every single thing right on to what my life is right now.<br />
Married to Tucker, live in a house, drive a Honda, and have 4 kids.<br />
The kids died.<br />
"It was Riiiiiiiight!"<br />
This phase of older kids does have its perks.<br />
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I will ride it out and smile more during the fights. Laugh at the elementary age jokes. And thank my lucky stars I have 4 beautiful healthy kids who are learning and growing, and I get the privilege of watching it all.<br />
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-50111404229941688682017-01-22T22:05:00.000-07:002017-01-22T23:30:05.632-07:00A Haiku<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A Haiku for my weekend.</div>
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Three days with my sibs.</div>
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Hole in my nose three times through.</div>
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A llama for all.</div>
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I have always wanted my nose pierced. It's something that I used to say, well if i <i>weren't</i> mormon I would definitely get my nose pierced! Tuck knew it, even my mom knew it. Five months after leaving the church I felt like it was time. I felt enough time had passed to be resepectful... (to whom I was trying to respect i dunno). I kept trying to wait it out longer. I didn't want people to judge me. My actions. And then relate those actions to my decision to leave the church. I didn't want people to treat me differently. I didn't want people to think I was seeking attention, or just rebelling. I even worried a bit how my kids would react. It's something so minor to other people, but for me it was a big thing... yet not a big deal at all! Then Tucker and I were having a conversation and of course he says the obvious.. who cares. Who cares what other people think. People will always make assumptions. You gotta do you. I love him. Because in that moment he was telling me the exact lines I tell my kids. </div>
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I realized I just had to do it. Because that's what I wanted to do. That's it. I wanted to pierce my nose. That moment of clarity was enough that I made the decision. I got a referral from my cousin. I told my sister that after I picked her up from the airport she was coming with me straight there. I committed. Because I wanted to. And I can do whatever I well please. </div>
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Lucky me though, got to be pierced three times. Three. Times. Apparently my nose is "unique" inside and has a stubborn ridge that kept making the piercing the wrong angle. But third times a charm and I loved it. And I also loved the discount they gave me because of it. I'll be downgrading to the smallest stud size when its all healed. And I cannot wait. </div>
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With my sister was in town and my oldest brother out of prison, that made all four of us Hope siblings in town together. So we got together with our Peruvian cousins and all got matching llama tattoos by my beautiful talented and selfless cousin Eryka. There was no better time and place for my first tattoo, surrounded by my brothers and sister. My amazing supportive husband. And my rad cousins. I have to admit i was nervous picking a spot to put my amazing llama. I'm a very indecisive person so this was quite the task for me. But I found a nice little home for my llama on the side of my wrist. And a bonus was this small of a tattoo in that location did not hurt as bad as that bloody nose piercing! Can I just say too, my llama is the most beautiful llama I've ever seen. I'm forever grateful for my cousins to share it with.</div>
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I'm still me. I haven't gone off the deep end. I am not lost. I am me. I am doing the things I've always wanted to do, but had to suppress. And doing these things make me happy. I feel like I am becoming me. In a new light. The person that was buried. I feel free. </div>
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And I hope those that truly know me and love me, will see that. But I am also realistic that even people who think know me.. or even really do know me... may still pull away and choose to think differently of me. And I'm working on being okay with that.</div>
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But... as Weezer would say..</div>
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"If you don't like it, you can shove it. But you don't like it, you <i>love</i> it."</div>
Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-8142311965382100812017-01-15T22:57:00.000-07:002017-02-23T22:00:38.370-07:00The great stuff & Turning points of 2016<div style="text-align: center;">
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2016 was a really great year.</div>
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The really really Great stuff:<br />
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<li>Tucker started his RN job in the ICU.. that also came with a real salary! say whattt</li>
<li>We took our first real family vacation with just our family of 6. Camping on the Oregon Coast is unreal amazing.</li>
<li>Tucker and I have been on a fantastic journey in our marriage and it has never been better.</li>
<li>Tucker and I went on our honeymoon and to celebrate our 10 year anniversary a tad early in Barbados. My life has been changed and travel is calling my name. That time together was amazing. We definitely lived the motto of "Treat yoself" </li>
<li>Arli cut her hair short... hello pre teen</li>
<li>Beck got braces and then got them off!</li>
<li>I finished my first triathlon. Something I never thought I could do.. but I survived the swim!</li>
<li>The kids started at a new school where they are thriving at. And do all the typical elementary school stuff which I adore.</li>
<li>We've made amazing new friends. The kind where all your kids magically play together and are best friends and us adults can have fun too. It's magic.</li>
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The turning point stuff:<br />
We really had our own paths separately for this. But personally, I began to really examine my faith.<br />
I had struggled with my religion for some time. Beginning of the year I started looking deeper. Though I had my own issues in the back of my head for a while, when I couldn't look away any longer I had to truly examine my faith. And it was the best thing I ever did. Even just saying that is bizarre. But it's true to my thoughts and feelings.. in every aspect thus far. I realized how much growing up in the religion really affected me negatively and affects me to this day which I try and be mindful of. I came to my conclusion and luckily after some hit and miss, Tucker was right there with me. (I'm not typing out my whole transition spiel in this particular post though.)<br />
We arrived at the same conclusion separately. It seriously was a beautiful thing. I feel very lucky to be on the same page as my spouse about it.<br />
I personally was dealing with this journey most of 2016 already and then together we left the LDS church in August and began deciding together our new route. That in itself was really unifying for us. I'm proud of us.<br />
A lot of things are better than ever before. Just life in general is happier for us. And I realize that is probably hard for some people to hear. By some, I mean, MOST everyone that knows us. Maybe even not believable to some. And that's okay. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, beliefs, and feelings. I just personally can say how I feel. How I genuinely am happier. But not only me, my oldest kids are too. And that brings me even more peace.<br />
Us leaving the church isn't something I declared publicly when it happened. Yet I know word of mouth travels fast. And this is indeed a small world. I find it interesting interacting with friends or people when I know they've talked about my church activity to anyone but me. And they think I don't know. Honestly, I genuinely find it interesting. It's almost like I'm watching a movie and I'm just waiting to see how this all plays out. Who's going to still be a genuine friend. Who will fade away. Who will be nosy for their own benefit. Who will try and save me. Or who will not acknowledge it again after you tell them.<br />
I feel lucky to have my family who love me unconditionally. And we can speak openly about this and anything else. I'm pretty lucky to have a handful of truly loving friends who accept me and love me along this journey. It'd be a pretty lonely rode without them all.<br />
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I learned a lot in 2016. I did a lot in 2016. I was brave in 2016! And I did me- with love in my heart. And I'm proud of that.<br />
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-30981300727260948042015-03-10T08:35:00.001-06:002015-03-10T08:35:42.872-06:00In a Year<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Almost one whole year has passed since I last wrote in this space.<br />
In that year I have grown immensley. I think it was the best year personally, I've had. I grew to know myself more. It was a lot of experiences that showed me I am so capable. Capable of doing hard things physically, mentally, and spirtually.<br />
I ran Robie Creek April 2014. It was so beyond hard. But so worth it! What a rush! I know if I can train to do that, my other goals seem reachable- so that's super exciting to me.<br />
2014 was definitely my year for racing and doing those things for me.<br />
I also ran in the Sawtooth Relay with some girlfriends. The mountains were cleansing to my soul. I am so weird when it comes to my mentality while running- so I practiced overcoming that.<br />
I ran in the Wasatch Back Ragnar race with a group of people I didn't even know. I knew one friend there. and made lifelong memories with new ones. Maybe not so much outwardly, because I am kinda hard to get to know in a group, but more me on the inside. It was so hard for me to be there almost "alone" on the inside at first. I missed my kids and felt so guilty. But running races with people is a beautiful thing! And I got to know those teammates maybe even more than I wanted to haha. I feel so blessed to have been able to run that race because of those selfless friends.<br />
In the summer I also went away on a quick girls trip to McCall. I could have brought my kids, but they had swimming lessons, so away I went. It was a revitalizing couple of days! At first I felt bad and almost regret going. But I pushed that aside as much as I could and I then really really enjoyed that time just relaxing (not running) without my kids.<br />
Tucker was beyond supportive. One week I was only home one full day with all the racing and traveling. He has grown a lot too, it shows in how much I got to do for myself with his help.<br />
Then to close off a great race season I ran the FitOne Half Marathon. Not only was it a beautiful course- probably my favorite so far- but I also revealed to my family and friends that I was pregnant with #4 babe. I wore a shirt that said "running for 2" Although I was only like 10 weeks -hehe so not yet showing (to anyone else at least) and not totally sick yet. So it was great timing for me! I took the race super easy and that was so hard! My time was way better than I thought it was going to be just going easy, so I knew I could have gotten under 2 hours for sure if I had been in the "racing" mindset. But played it safe for bebe.<br />
We found out bebe was a boy the day after my birthday! Shock consumed all of us.. and tears consumed me and Arli. Real life feeling over here ha. But now months later I am truly excited for Rivers to have a bff. But I still need that 2nd girl sometime....<br />
I was really good about continuing to workout while pregnant up until December. Now I walk one mile on the treadmill and I am hurtin and spent.<br />
Trials have still persisted off and on. But as it goes on, I am getting better at dealing with them in a healthy way for me and my family. I still will never know what the future holds for me. But I cannot live in worry of the future. I won't let the adversary rob me of my joy in my life. I am still practicing, but I am happy in the moment.. and as long I know I am doing all I can, I can find peace. I think that was the biggest thing I learned in 2014 was about finding Peace.<br />
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That was my 2014 in a nutshell.<br />
I may or may not update the blog on happenings of 2014. I would like to. I have so many pictures that I love from that fabulous year.<br />
<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02684030175247027801noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-7368910715216329052014-04-08T16:38:00.001-06:002014-04-08T16:40:02.543-06:00Life goes on<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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It's funny how life goes on sometimes.<br />
I've been M.I.A. around this space. And I feel fine about it actually. I've been focusing on some other aspects of my life that needed some attention. Getting things in order. Re-grouping. Life is grand.. but in the grand scheme there always must be some trials. But yet, I am blessed beyond belief.<br />
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The holidays came and went! Phew!<br />
Our 7th anniversary came and went! Wow!<br />
Arli's 5th birthday came and went! Crazy!<br />
Rivers is talking and is an actual toddler! Ah!<br />
Spring is upon us and I feel renewed. Just like the newly blooming flowers around me. I feel myself becoming once more. I am feeling a little more whole each day.<br />
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I took this picture of Arli a month or so ago. I love it.<br />
She is strong, sensitive, kind, loving, and caring. She is truly a free spirit. She is in tune with herself. She loves with all she has. I look up to her in countless ways. I want to be like her. I want to know myself in and out and love every bit of it. I want to create what my mind brews up. I want to love like she loves.<br />
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I want to see things through my kids' eyes more. I really do. I want to slow down and enjoy this fleeting time I have with them.<br />
Because admist the errands, chores, work, and heartwrenching trials.. these little ones are growing up.<br />
And I want to soak it all up!<br />
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02684030175247027801noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-45052144357816676142013-11-17T11:23:00.002-07:002013-11-17T11:23:47.582-07:00Rivers & a pop<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This guy. </div>
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I swear he is making up for being the best baby ever and turning into the busiest toddler ever. Not bad at ALL, just so busy. </div>
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One minute I'm changing his diaper, looking for a diaper, and the next minute he's on the kitchen table swiggin leftover mini pop. </div>
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Not to mention drawing all over my walls, my new coffee table (a friend built for me), and of course his face. </div>
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But then he looks at me.. with that sweet face, big hazel eyes, and undeniable dimples!! </div>
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Stop it right there Riv. </div>
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This is hardly fair. </div>
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How can my motherly discipline compete with that coming at me all day. </div>
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Even Beck and Arli see it. </div>
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Rivers turns into our own midget Godzilla and terrorizes their toys, little people villages, and lego creations. Beck will fight him off all while talking to him in that cute voice reserved just for Rivers. Arli will scream and yell and watch him crush her creations but then carry him elsewhere and give him other toys. </div>
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We love him.</div>
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I love him. </div>
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All that chubba lub of him. </div>
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How is he still so chubby?!? I have no idea. </div>
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Cause trust me, he's moving-walking-running, and that chub is still there. </div>
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And those cheeks look pretty set in their ways. </div>
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And I love every ounce of it.</div>
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This guy. </div>
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This sweet lovable Riv Guy is our sunshine. </div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-51340557978610983732013-10-10T21:57:00.000-06:002013-10-10T21:57:23.982-06:00Bike ridin' <br />
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My car is in the shop. So we are a one car family for a bit. Tucker would normally let me have his car and ride his bike everywhere but his wheel is busted.<br />
So me and the kids are on our bikes a bit more when Tucker has the car.<br />
Since I have had it all set up anyway, we've been on more bike rides, along with riding to and from school.<br />
It is perfect weather. Beck loves it. Riv and Arli are contained and love it. We don't ever have an agenda. We are in the moment. I follow him as he leads us right or left, whichever he feels like exploring. Beck tells me stories of his day at school. Arli "clicks" her mouth and has me guess what song she's "clicking". Rivers laughs and makes his voice heard. We ride until Beck gets tired. And every time we get home and off our bikes I feel renewed. I'm a better mom. I get more things done. I don't waste as much time. The feeling carries into the rest of our day/evening and I do more real things with my kids. I think they kinda like me more. I know I like me more.<br />
I hope my kids always love the outdoors as much as I do. But they can only learn to love it if we are out there. Soakin it up. Throwing rocks. Watching the river.<br />
I love going over the bridge. Beck usually slows down as he trys to pedal hard up the bridge. Once we get to the middle, I slow down almost stopping and look over the river. I look each way and breathe in deep. Boise is so beautiful. And my kids are so lucky to grow up here. I feel luckier to be physically able to be active with them and show them their surroundings.<br />
Truth be told I probably wouldn't have even been biking as much had my car still been available.<br />
I won't go as far to say I'm thankful that my car broke down. But I'm grateful for this little gift I found. A gift for my kids. But even more a gift to myself.<br />
Each day I feel more grounded.<br />
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Beck may have caught on to the bike riding trend going on. Today he asked if we could go on a bike ride. Usually I'll sit and think about it. But right away I answered "Sure! Let's go!" He beamed! Was beyond excited.<br />
I overheard him tell Arli, "hey Arli, try it, ask mommy if we can go on a bike ride and every time she'll say Yes! From now on!" hahah Oh Beck.<br />
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-54146613744452672172013-10-09T10:26:00.002-06:002013-10-09T10:26:42.156-06:00Crying Baby<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My life is like this picture.<br />
Everyone is trying to hard to make it work. Make it worth while. Make it beautiful. Just trying to make it from point A to point B. But then theres that one baby, kinda throwin it off. No matter how good the others look... There will still be this crying baby front and center. But I still love this picture.. Crying baby and all. And life will go on without a perfect picture.<br />
My life is like this picture.<br />
And while everything is kind of finding it's place and we are figuring things out, my stupid car is that crying baby.<br />
But I still love my life.. and life will go on.<br />
But man.... there's always something isn't there?<br />
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When it comes down to it... I really love this picture.<br />
<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-79387407987136684742013-10-08T10:34:00.003-06:002013-10-08T10:44:03.957-06:00Be Brave<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It is amazing what a little sharing can do. </div>
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I shared the link to my post yesterday on facebook and At first I didn't know why I felt compelled to do so. Heck, I really didn't want to. But I thought what the heck.. this is me. And I'm going to be brave.. Because I AM brave. </div>
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It's funny.. when I got home the other weekend from my "girls weekend" Beck saw my new necklace and started to sound it out.. "B..eeee ba ba brrr ave. Be Brave?!" And he laughed and laughed. </div>
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He said "You're brave??" </div>
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I said to him "Uh Yeah. I am! Cause I can do anything, and that makes me brave."</div>
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Oh the kid just laughed again! </div>
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haha I didn't take it personally.. I found it hilarious that he really thought it was funny!</div>
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Hilarious but also like.. what the heck!?</div>
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Today he saw it again and said, "Be brave." and laughed again. </div>
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And I said, "Well yeah, why can't I be brave?" </div>
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He said "I didn't know girls could be brave, only boys." </div>
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Ohhhh little boy. I have much to teach you.</div>
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I said to him, "Oh yes Beck.. Women and girls are just as brave or EVEN MORE brave than boys." </div>
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This time he didn't laugh. </div>
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He thought about it. I could see his little brain pondering that. </div>
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I got a swift kick in the gut that my son needs to know how important women are in this life. </div>
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And that women and girls are just as strong as boys. </div>
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But more importantly, that we all can be brave. </div>
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Brave to face our fears. </div>
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Our challenges. </div>
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To really feel those emotions. </div>
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To do something for ourselves. </div>
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To go after something huge. </div>
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To BE ourselves. </div>
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To completely own our happiness.</div>
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Even though I didn't talk details of my trial in my post yesterday, the post reached out to so many. </div>
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I heard from many that they were in the same boat. And at first I was like.. oh if they only knew what boat I'm in. They are def. not in my boat. They don't want to be in my boat.</div>
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But then I realized.</div>
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It doesn't matter what boat you're in. </div>
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The aftermath of the boat being swayed by the violent waves will take it's toll. </div>
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And I truly realized. </div>
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It is the same. </div>
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Our healing is the same. </div>
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Our heart's desire to find oneself again, is the same. </div>
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My trial doesn't have to be the same as yours, to feel connected and more.</div>
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I feel so supported and uplifted. </div>
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I have some pretty great people cheering me on. </div>
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It pays off to be brave.</div>
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-194631845037507552013-10-07T16:40:00.002-06:002013-10-07T17:27:23.515-06:00I Run.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I went on a run today. Except, I didn't call it a run. In my mind it was just a jog. When Tucker asked if I was going on a run, I replied "oh no.. a jog. I'm going on a jog." Somehow the word jog was more laid back. I didn't want to get ahead of myself. It was the perfect time to sneak away from the family and do something for me. When I have tried to do this recently, it's proven to be hard. I find excuses. It felt selfish. I used to be an avid runner! With running clothes I actually used for running! How did it become this way after having Rivers?<br />
I can answer that question. Trials. Something we all have. But we each have such different circumstances or hardships we are dealing with. And mostly dealing with behind closed doors. No one wants to hear the ugly stuff. But wait.. I do. I want to be open. I want to be real. And the thing I want the most is to heal. I want to find myself again.<br />
Admist the turmoil of my own trial over the years, I have lost myself. I used to think it was because I became I teen mom. And yes, that played a huge role in the beginning. But these past years have weighed on me. Beaten me down little by little. This trial has been winning me over. Anxiety has plagued me along with other emotional lows. I was still doing my day to day, and there were good days and bad days. But there were also so many good days with my kids. But I did not realize until recently just how much I lost myself. I was just trying to stay afloat. <a href="http://trueblueaggies.blogspot.com/2013/10/shuffling.html" target="_blank">As my friend put it</a>.. I was just a duck, on the pond, happy happy happy, but what you couldn't see were my legs swimming constantly to keep from sinking. The past few weeks I've been that duck. I've been lost and fragile just trying to find my way in this journey.<br />
The other weekend I went on a "girls weekend". But with girls I had never met before in my life. But we were all women who shared one thing in common. Talking, healing, and yoga took place. I left that weekend feeling alive! Liberated, validated, and hopeful. I am not alone.<br />
But more importantly, I can heal. I can find myself. I have so much hope in... ME. And that feels good.<br />
On my jog I just tried to relax. There were so many beautiful things around me. I didn't listen to music, instead I listened to me. I went faster when I felt strong, but when I slowed down or walked, I told myself ITS OKAY! And when my mind was playing tricks on me I chanted my mantra for today "I can find myself. I can find myself." I caught myself getting emotional repeating it over and over. Because I indeed CAN do it. I can do anything. I can do freaking hard things. And I will.<br />
When I got home Tucker said, "how was your run?" I didn't correct him this time. It was a great run. Who jogs these days anyway?<br />
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-25665076216179763122013-07-25T19:10:00.001-06:002013-07-25T19:12:26.338-06:00Rivers is 1<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Rivers Tucker Botkin is 1! </div>
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Seriousy.. that was fast. </div>
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He is the sweetest boy ever. </div>
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He is always a charmer smilin at people. I love it. </div>
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He is 21 lbs. His head is in the 89% and in the 8th % for height! I got a squaty shorty on my hands! </div>
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( I was wondering why he was still able to wear his 9 month onsies)</div>
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He is cruising everywhere as long as he has something to hold on to.</div>
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Stands, but not walking yet. But so close! </div>
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He loves to mimmick us and laugh at things that make no sense haha.</div>
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He totally knows what no means.</div>
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His first word was "Dada" last week.</div>
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And this week he added "Wow" to his vocabulary. </div>
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Such a funny boy and knows exactly what i'm saying to him. </div>
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His feet are oh so little. Still a size 3! </div>
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He is still the most amazing sleeper.. sleeping 12 hours in their shared room.</div>
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He loves loves his brother and sister. </div>
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He loves playing with them and its the sweetest thing to watch them interact. </div>
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He's been climbing stairs for a couple months now.. But has had the misfortune of falling down them too. Ay yi yi. </div>
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I cannot get enough of my Riv boy! He is our sunshine of our family! </div>
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His face will go from normal, cute big eyes, plump lips, to the sweetest smile I've ever seen and my heart melts into blubber! Completely melted! </div>
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So thankful for Rivers in my life. He brightens every day. </div>
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My good friend <a href="http://meggiesphoto.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Megan</a> took these pictures of Riv and unexpectedly snuck a few of me in there too. I'm lucky to have her as my friend! so talented and giving! I'll cherish these pictures forever.</div>
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-59942404777355744982013-07-19T10:40:00.002-06:002013-07-19T10:42:40.472-06:00Black Rock<iframe src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/70635526?color=c9ff23" width="850" height="478" frameborder="0" webkitAllowFullScreen mozallowfullscreen allowFullScreen></iframe><br />
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Camping at Black Rock.</div>
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We went on an impromtu camping trip just for a night. </div>
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It was just our little family. </div>
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No cell phone service.</div>
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No disuprtions.</div>
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It was so nice. </div>
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We explored the rocks and caught baby fish.</div>
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Roasted hot dogs and mallows.</div>
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Woke up to explore again. </div>
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Our quick trip was perfect. I captured so many moments that I never want to forget. </div>
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I'll post pictures soon. But for now, I just finished a sweet video.</div>
Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-71105779972230788912013-07-14T11:46:00.000-06:002013-07-14T11:47:04.257-06:00What was..<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Life is such an unexpected ride. Full of turns, surprises, and drop offs.<br />
Through my experiences I have really learned to go with the flow of what life hands me. I try not to stress over the little things. Things that used to keep me up at night and waste so much of my energy. When you cannot control life, what's the point of throwing so much weight into it. Though I admit it's not always as easy to do.<br />
In late May the kids went to a playdate and I had no errands, no gift cards to spend, and no plan. Tucker texted me to get a pregnancy test. I laughed out loud and in my text back, but reluctantly agreed.<br />
This is where the unexpected of life swoops in and throws me for a ride.<br />
The pregnancy test was positive. I was shocked, scared, and stressed. Not because I was having another so soon. (I looove having them so close) But because of what people would think of me. It seems no matter how old I am, even of child bearing age now, people will always think of me as too young to have a baby. Or is that just the print that being a teen mom left on me? Whichever, I was in tears because of the results.<br />
After a phone call to one of my best friends, I was normal again. Reality had set in and I was thrilled. Another baby! And probably my last. I escaped the silly worries of others' judgements, and excitement filled me.<br />
I told Tucker and he was shocked, but with a smile. He was so happy but of course as reality sets in the planning comes into play. We'd need a new car. How would the rooms workout? Was it another winter baby? And Ohhh I wanted a girl! It was becoming real! And it consumed all my thoughts.<br />
I got to work on appointments and the waiting game began. Little did I know it would be a whole month of the waiting game to fully see what was happening.<br />
I didn't feel pregnant at all, but I thought maybe this time was a lucky time. A bit of doubt was in my mind also which is why I could barely handle the wait. I tried to keep busy which wasn't hard with 3 kids, swimming lessons, gymnastics, hikes, and more.<br />
My first appointment was an ultrasound a couple weeks later. We were so anxious. It was all too familiar and I longed to see a baby. When the screen showed an empty uterus I was crushed. We were crushed.<br />
The Tech made light of it and said since we didn't know the due date, becuase of lack of last period information, to come back in 2 weeks and then we can see more growth and get a due date. As of what was on the screen the sac looked about 4 weeks along. I mentioned how that couldn't be possible right? Since I took the test more than 2 prior to that, there was no way for a pregnancy test to detect that early. She dismised my comment and said we didn't know anything and to wait and come back.<br />
Right then I knew it was going to be a miscarraige. This exact thing has <a href="http://michelleandtucker.blogspot.com/2010/08/bring-on-fall-please.html" target="_blank">happened before</a>. We knew that when we came back there would be no progress or worse, it'd all be over already.<br />
And turns out we were right. I never wanted to be so wrong in my life. I already was so attatched to the idea of another baby. I wanted that baby. I wanted a miracle. And for a bit here and there I thought I might get one.<br />
I miscarried almost exactly a month after I found out. Of course it was hard. Even though I was ready for it. I knew it was coming. But of course that doesn't make it any easier.<br />
The nurse said how this kind of miscarraige is the high percentage of them. But then why does no one talk about it? I wish it weren't all so hush hush. Or responses completely silent. My heart ached. I'm grateful for friends and family that have reached out to me and checked up on me during the process. And listened to me. It is a loss, and sometimes that's all one needs. And of course I'm grateful for the 3 amazing beautiful healthy kids I have right now. Just thinking of them makes me smile.<br />
We did not plan that pregnancy. And in the end of course my Heavenly Father knows us best and what we need and when. Though I hate to admit it, we could use a bit of time to prepare for this last little spirit to join our family. But now since we were so close.. I find myself yearning for a newborn. I'm grateful to say that I am not bitter towards those who are pregnant or have a newborn. Far far from that. This is my own journey. And I will gladly hold your cute newborn. Gotta get my fill until our time comes once again.<br />
Until then, life goes on and thank goodness we are in the middle of summer to keep us busy. Making fun memories with our kids. Going on adventures. Trying new things. And loving on the chubby cheeks of my Riv. Turning what was into what is now. This is precious time that I am trying with all my might to not let go to waste.<br />
<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-75796996582226963122013-07-08T14:04:00.002-06:002013-07-08T14:11:38.373-06:00America's Birthday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A picture of Tucker taking a picture of Rivers and the fireworks.<br />
And below.. Tucker's result of that picture. <br />
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So sweet how that worked out</td></tr>
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4th of July. We have a lot of love for our country. Of course Tucker is just a full on patriotic person. He loves America's history and everything it entails. I always think about my mom and her family coming from Peru, leaving their luxury life behind to come live in the land of the Free. They had to start all over. And I'm so thankful they did. Thankful and beyond proud.<br />
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We had a day well spent! Went to breakfast with the ward. Then Abby took us to her "water spot". We were so confused where she was taking us.. and it was a bit of a hike to get to the spot but it was well worth it! We beat the crowds at all the other water places with this spot. And there was a rope swing! It may have been into really shallow water though. Tucker and Abby both did it. I only swung on the rope (just warmin up ;). And Brin didn't even get to swing because some people took it and changed the length, completely ruining it. Bummer.<br />
We got some good some and enjoyed a good time together.<br />
Later that evening we had dinner at my parents and then visited Tuck's Dad. And booked it out of there just in time to see the fireworks from the Meridian Speedway. On the way there we saw so many fireworks going off around Meridian and Boise. We usually go to Ann Morrison so I was bummed about that. But the Speedway's finale was amaaazing. I was totally surprised. But next year we want to go to Table Rock and just see them all. That would be so cool, though I'm sure the kids would enjoy Ann Morrison better.<br />
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I have so much to be thankful for in this beautiful country we live in. I'm most grateful for our freedoms and the brave ones who protect it and us. And of course that we can spend so much time with our family. I have an amazing bunch.<br />
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-85552983252826480292013-07-02T11:01:00.000-06:002013-07-02T11:32:17.769-06:0011 month old Rivers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Time is going too fast! My Rivers is 11 months old! He will be 1 in just a few weeks here in July. </div>
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I really don't know how this can be. I swear I just had him.. </div>
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Rivers is learning lots of more things.</div>
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Along with all his other tricks I mentioned last month.. he now also:</div>
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Blows kisses! </div>
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waves goodbye with his little hand opening and closing (instead of waving his whole arm)</div>
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Cruises walking behind his walker toy.</div>
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Standing up on his own for a few seconds here and there.</div>
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Climbs stairs (no!!)</div>
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He is crawling on his hands and knees all the time now.</div>
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Is trying to talk to us so much. It's hilaroius. </div>
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Though these pictures don't show it.. he is our smiliest happy baby. </div>
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His hair is turning that golden brown like Arli's, from the sun.</div>
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His arms and legs are as dark as mine! </div>
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He is a stinkin flirt and charmer. </div>
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He is so different than Beck and Arli were as babies. </div>
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He just loves life and is so smiley. And is happy to just chill.</div>
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He still only has 2 teeth, but judging by his fussiness that is about to change. </div>
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He inhales grahm crackers. Love them! </div>
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But he also loves all food.. if you keep putting food in front of him, he'll keep eating.</div>
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He loves dogs! It is hilarious to watch him with Moby. But even seeing dogs on the street or store he gets so happy and squeels and points.</div>
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He understands so much of what we are saying to him. He reacts accordingly.. poor guy just can't talk yet haha. He still hasn't said his "first word" but my guess it will be either "Dog" "Dad" or "Ball"</div>
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People still say all the time he looks exactly like Daddy. </div>
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But those lips people... come on.. I'm claimin those babys.</div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-5337767160948454022013-06-03T11:21:00.001-06:002013-06-03T14:00:18.638-06:00Table Rock. Check!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The kids and I hiked Table Rock with my "sister" Abby last Thursday. </div>
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I really didn't think Beck and Arli were going to be able to go up all the way. </div>
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But with a bit of motivation they made it all the way!</div>
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I could tell Beck was really proud of himself.</div>
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And Arli.. just a little girl! I am a proud mama. </div>
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We couldn't have done it without Abby. </div>
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She didn't know it but she kept my patience up for the kids and more. </div>
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Not to mention it was great girl talk too. </div>
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I adore Abby! I am so glad my brother found someone so sweet and lively!</div>
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It was a great workout with Riv on my back also. </div>
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But Oh my gosh. But my back STILL hurts from it! So next time Tuck will have to carry him. </div>
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And I don't know if Beck and Arli will want to hike it again this year haha. </div>
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But they did it once and know they can do it now. </div>
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I haven't hiked Table Rock for yearssss! And it was on my to do list this summer. Check! </div>
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Many more to come, sans kids.</div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-64166437390367005822013-05-30T08:37:00.001-06:002013-05-30T09:11:53.772-06:00Rivers 10 months<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My baby boy Riv turned 10 months old on May 20th. </div>
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He is still army crawling. </div>
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He can - Wave hello and goodbye</div>
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Give high fives</div>
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Gives some goood open mouth kisses</div>
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If you're lucky he'll dance on command</div>
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Knows where his head is</div>
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Pulls himself up to standing</div>
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This lil guy is still the sweetest and relaxed baby. </div>
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Although he's been teething for a good while now.. which makes it hard for him to fall asleep at night. </div>
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And he always wants mama. Even with the teething .. it equals out to be an average baby instead of really really good baby. </div>
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Those two bottom baby teeth kill me. So cute.</div>
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The boy loves food. </div>
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Although he has thinned out a lot, I think. </div>
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Since crawling, it's mainly just his face that is chubby now. </div>
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He is an awesome sleeper. He never wakes up in the middle of the night. </div>
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And this has been since we moved him to his crib. </div>
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And of course he loves his naptime. </div>
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He is starting to walk behind his lil push toy and loves it. </div>
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And no I didn't even edit these pictures one bit. His skin is just a nice tan brown. </div>
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And yes.. I put sunscreen on him ;)</div>
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His hair is turning a light brown. like Arli's.</div>
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he is babbling like crazy and trying to talk to us. </div>
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I don't count the babbling "dadas " and "mamas" quite yet. </div>
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We love our Rivers! </div>
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He is a piece of sunshine in our family.</div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-41544192417096647202013-05-29T14:16:00.002-06:002013-05-29T14:21:49.383-06:00A Hike<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Boise is Beck's official stopping grounds. </div>
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In that picture above he was saying, "So this is alllllllll Boise?"</div>
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He was thrilled.</div>
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We had a lovely little hike up at Camelsback. You could say it was the kids try out for Table Rock. </div>
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It was so refreshing. And I loved watching the kids in tow. </div>
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This summer will be packed with many more. </div>
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We want to be outside much more this summer than last. </div>
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I was hugely pregnant last summer and I didn't get to enjoy what living down here truly had to offer. </div>
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But this year is a different story. </div>
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I feel like being outside brings us so much closer together and more joy than paying to take them to a movie.. or jump place.. or what ever it may be. </div>
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We are teaching them about their surroundings. Where they live. The history of it. And to love it. </div>
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And that feeling is one of the greatest feelings of parenthood I think. To give your kids something real to enjoy. And fuel that love for the outdoors.</div>
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I am in love with these pictures of them with downtown in the background. All the trees. </div>
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I hope some of them will be their favorites one day too.</div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-88294258671632371352013-04-03T16:54:00.003-06:002013-04-03T16:54:45.586-06:00Easter Weekend <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Easter weekend (long) rundown:</div>
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We started our Easter weekend with a BBQ with friends at our place. We decorated Easter eggs with our new cool method of shaving cream! it was fun! But note for next time- boil more eggs. We had a lot of fun and are blessed to have some pretty cool friends. </div>
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Saturday was a fun busy day! We started it off right with an Easter egg hunt at our Bishop's amazing house. It was so fun. Arli got to swing on the cutest swing with her lil friend from Sunbeams. That swing is magical. I love it. </div>
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Then we finished off our Saturday with our niece Eden's baptism. 8 is great! After her baptism we had an Easter egg hunt with all the kids. Sooo many eggs. Sooo many kids! It was so fun to watch. Arli was especially hilarious to watch. At one point she was picking these candy carrot things up and throwing them back on the ground not knowing they were candy hahah. Beck was pretty serious about the whole deal and equally entertaining to watch. </div>
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I was just loving soaking in the moment watching my lil family. </div>
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And these two seriously melted my heart. I die. </div>
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And i know there's so many pics of arli.. but dang that girl is always posing! Beck.. not so much.</div>
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Easter Morning we started with our own lil egg hunt. </div>
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Beck woke up first and we could hear him head downstairs.. The Easter bunny left a trail of carrots ya know. He came back up and was so excited to go hunt in the yard.. then he said "I wonder where our boiled eggs are going to be that he hid!" .......... Cue Tucker's response.. eyes wide.. no eye contact.. "Boiiileeed eggs...." Then he dissapeared for a few min and went to go hide those haha. It was freakin hilarious i tell you. </div>
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We then attempted some family pictures via the tripod. But .. well ya know. The result was satisfactory.. but nothing amazing haha. We are a rough group to photograph i guess. But the kids are dang cute! and got a couple of them in their rad Easter attire.</div>
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Then we went on a bike ride.. we don't have anything for Beck to ride yet so he squeezed in with Arli and Riv. hahah it was the best. Riv was just snug as a bug between the two big kids. And he slept the entire ride. Tuck was a real stud for pulling all three of them. </div>
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We got home just in time to head to Gma Hope's Easter dinner with my family. Which was good eats and good company. I LOVEADORElovelovelove my brothers' girlfriends. They are the best! </div>
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Easter weekend was busy... but so fun. A great kick off to our spring! </div>
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And now... the kids are on a continuous sugar high. </div>
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<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-49706250390832017282013-03-19T15:21:00.001-06:002013-03-19T15:22:32.782-06:00I'm back.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well the deed is done and we are all moved into our new place. Hallelujah! We love it!<br />
It's bigger and better in a lot of ways. But man, I'm so glad its all done. I forget what a pain moving is. But it's also nice to purge a lot of stuff in the process.<br />
Admist the choas I snapped these pictures of Arli and Moby in the backyard. I will seriously miss that fence.. and not just because we don't have a fence for the yard here in the new place.. but because that fence was an amazing backdrop. sigh. I didn't even have to edit my pictures. Love.<br />
I look at those pictures and cannot get over how stunning Arli is. She is just so naturally beautiful. It's almost painful. She is such a sweet sweet girl. A bit whiny.. but sweet ;)<br />
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Things that are making me happy these days..<br />
Watching Riv crawl.<br />
My new couch and rug.<br />
My walk in closet.<br />
Beck's swooping hair.<br />
Arli's bum crack always sneakin out.<br />
Having my husband back during weeknights. (goodbye cna night job)<br />
Moby.. that lil dog<br />
Being in this new place feels refreshing.. much needed. Clean slate.<br />
<br />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-63073901383017460322013-02-27T20:59:00.003-07:002013-02-27T21:02:17.640-07:00mylifeneedstoslowdown<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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What? i just barely made it to the computer to blog in almost a month?<br />
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Yeah.. whats done is done.<br />
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I literally have a list... (i'm a list maker) of posts that need to be blogged... sickening i tell you. </div>
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But before I get to those, I have something much more pressing weighing on my mind. </div>
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I've been hecka busy lately. One thing after another and it shows no signs of slowing down. </div>
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We went to Utah this last weekend and got to escape from reality for a few days. </div>
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It was magical. Good company, good food! And family just spoiling my lil family. It warmed my heart so. </div>
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Then we got home Sunday and decided to look for a place. </div>
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Monday. I found one through a ward friend. </div>
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And Tuesday we received the call that we got the place to rent! -pause- Yayyyyyyy! </div>
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Today we signed the lease and all that grown up stuff. </div>
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We move in 2 weeks. Lots to do, but huge relief! </div>
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So today I finally decided I loved my family enough to go grocery shopping. Or more like Tucker has been making a list for 3 days now... hinting. waiting.</div>
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And so I got the deed done. I took all three kiddos at 6 in the evening. What was I thinking? Super crowded. Note. Don't go to Winco when people get off work. </div>
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So I had two kids in the cart and one walk by me. Got lots of stares..some good- some bad. Whatev people. </div>
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And we got all our delcious shopping done in a whopping Hour and a half! holy moses. </div>
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And considering that, Beck and Arli did really well! I had no complaints. Rivers was an angel of course, as usual. </div>
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So Beck and Arli each picked out a doughnut but we get home and my heart sunk when I couldn't find the bag. I totally left them at the checkout. MOMFAIL! </div>
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Beck's heart was broken. </div>
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The boy loooooves doughnuts. And he knew he deserved one. </div>
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They still loved me after I let them have cereal for dinner. at 7:45 mind you. (aka bedtime) They went to bed sweet and tired. </div>
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While I was putting Riv to sleep in their room, Alri goes out to fill her waterbottle like the miss independent she is. </div>
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She comes back and I say goodnight. Tell her I love her. And that girl made my heart burst into a million pieces and she said Goodnight, I love you too, and blew me a nice wet kiss. Then she blew Rivers a kiss. Walked over to her bed and blew a kiss at Beck on the top bunk. Heart melting! </div>
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I love when that girl blows kisses. Little did she know that I seriously needed one right then. </div>
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I watched her climb into bed. That silly girl is so loving. So forgiving. </div>
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And each night when I put them to bed I remember how lucky I am to have these sweet, beautiful, smart, just straight up good kids to call mine. </div>
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I have to admit something I do with my kids. After the especially hard days.. ya know the ones. When my mean mom comes out.. and I am impatient and unattentive with my little ones - that night when it slows down like that.. I apologize to them. I literally tell them how sorry I am for "such and such" and tell them I promise to be better tomorrow and tell them how much I love them. </div>
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I know they are naturally so forgiving.. but I do it to let them know that Mommy makes mistakes.. and they are still so loved. And I think it validates their feelings.</div>
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Guys, I'm nowhere near a perfect Mother. </div>
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But I can only try to be. </div>
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And love my kids along the way. </div>
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and kiss-hug-tickle-tease-squeeze- them every day.</div>
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-44431359766960564912013-01-31T17:06:00.001-07:002013-01-31T17:08:00.009-07:00snow dayWe have made good use of the snow...<br />
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I spent forever trying to figure out what songs to use... thank goodness for Rachel's and then Tucker's suggestions.. I finally finished it. It is not professional by any means.. but I totally enjoy making them.Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-42587828907580075882013-01-28T15:07:00.001-07:002013-01-28T15:31:26.192-07:002012 photo bookI've been working on our 2012 Family photo album for the past two weeks!! agh!<br />
With the first couple years of our family's photos I just printed them out and stuck them in an album. But 1. that takes forever! and 2. it gets spendy.<br />
I finally decided to try out making a photo book online. I just finished making it and will get it in the mail next week. I used lots of coupon codes so I saved over $100! They always have good deals goin on.<br />
I had fun making it.. but I'm kind of a perfectionist and I customized every page.. so thats why it took foreverr.<br />
here's a peek! Can't wait to get it in my hands!<br />
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<a href="http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=0AatmLJy1ZOWrpQ&cid=SFLYOCWIDGET&eid=115">Click here to view this photo book larger</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-books" style="color: #6666cc;">photo books</a>. </div>
<img border="0" height="1" src="https://os.shutterfly.com/b/ss/sflyshareprod/1/H.15/111?pageName=sharekey&c1=photobook&c2=blogger" style="background: #ffffff; border: none; box-shadow: none; padding: 0;" width="1" />Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-62525872441727152232013-01-28T10:22:00.003-07:002013-01-28T11:05:59.467-07:00Tree Branch HooksI wanted to share this gift I made for my brother for Christmas...<br />
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We drew names for my siblings and I was out of money. Like gonezo. My bro said he wanted a coat/hat hooks. I searched pinterest and found a small branch one and got to work on my own. </div>
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I just found the biggest broken tree branch in my alley. The one thing my alley has done me good for. </div>
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I sawed all the pieces and stapled them together! Easy peasy!! But more importantly, completely FREE.</div>
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And it looks so cool! A one of a kind piece. It's almost so unique and earthy that its modern. Too far? Okay. </div>
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I loved it so much I am going to make another for myself. Add that to my long list of projects ;) </div>
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Go find some branches and make one!</div>
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3533231929478358431.post-47301251188288632102013-01-11T08:30:00.001-07:002013-01-11T08:34:49.978-07:00Real Mom Moments caught on camera<div>
Motherhood isn't all fun, organized, and kids dressin cute. </div>
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Just watch this viedo and you'll understand what I'm saying. </div>
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Background story: It's dinnertime. Tucker is at work. We've been sitting at the table for 40 minutes. Kids won't eat their dinner. Words spitting out of my mouth are repetitive. I.might.be.going.crazy. </div>
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Good thing for sneaky videos to at least entertain me. And always remember these ..uhhh.. sweet moments.</div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="393" mozallowfullscreen="mozallowfullscreen" src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/57185646" webkitallowfullscreen="webkitallowfullscreen" width="700"></iframe> <br />
<a href="http://vimeo.com/57185646">Real Mom Moments</a> from <a href="http://vimeo.com/user14477176">Michelle Botkin</a> on <a href="http://vimeo.com/">Vimeo</a>.<br />
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Notice Arli keep looking at me every time she does something... trying to see what I'm gonna do about it. and at this point.. it was do nothing or go crazy. I went with do nothing. Of course I end the video on my sweetness Riv that is small and innocent and not able to do anything. You're welcome.<br />
p.s. I have way too many videos of Arli "in her own world" as we like to call it. She is quite the free spirited artsy fartsy sassy pants.</div>
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Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13299386823212424669noreply@blogger.com5